I had just spent the past ten months being a music education major and studying voice. For the first time in my life, I started hearing a difference in the sound of my voice, and I liked it. I liked it a lot. Suddenly, I could sing a long with all my Broadway CDs...and it sounded good. But you know, pride comes before the fall.
After months of anticipation, I was finally at CentriKid staff training. My first day of training was a full day of rehearsal for the skits that were a main part of mornings at camp. Having a passion for acting my entire life, I was so blessed to be able to do what I loved in ministry.
My character: Bread Beard the pirate. What do pirates sound like? Well of course, they have a rough, gravely voice.
That day during rehearsal, I noticed my throat hurting. The next morning, I couldn't speak. Two days later, my voice still was not back. During training, it was obvious that my voice would never get a rest with all the yelling I would be doing over the summer. I began to hear horror stories of the voices of staffers never being the same after camp...even of staffers not being able to sing.
I was stressed about my voice. Boy, was I dumb. I was so focused on myself that I never stopped to think that maybe God was teaching me something through this struggle.
Fortunately for me, I think God was determined to humble me.
The first week of camp started, and my voice was still not back to normal, but I was determined to push through. The first day of camp was full of energy and I gave everything I had to welcome the kids. However that night, I returned to the staff apartments and started feeling funny.
The next morning, I was completely sick. My head was spinning, my chest was full of gunk, and yes, I couldn't speak. I didn't know if I could get out of bed, let alone act, lead recreation, and everything else that I had to do that day.
Immediately, it became obvious that I couldn't do it on my own.
God completely humbled me by showing me how absolutely weak and insignificant I was. There is absolutely no way that I could have made it through that week of camp without God being completely in control of my actions. That day, I found the verse that would lead me through the whole summer.
"Fear not for I am with you;
Be not dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you, I will help you.
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
Isaiah 41:10
You know, God doesn't need us for anything. But He loved us enough to allow us to be his servants. We are so blessed to be able to be tools of His and to spread the Gospel for Him.
But, we can only effectively do that when we get over ourselves and allow Him to take over our lives.
"But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
2 Corinthians 12:9-10
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